Hi I’m Kristen Bell, and this
is my friend Andy Lasner. Andy could you come
here for a second? This is my friend Andy he’s the
executive producer at the Ellen Show. He’s also a gigantic baby. Ahh! [BLEEP] Andy! [BLEEP] Andy has no idea why we’re here. Why don’t you go ahead
and read the prompter? Hi, I’m Andy
Lasner, and I’m sad. Women get to experience
all the glory of childbirth while poor dads have to sit idly
by and give out free massages. That a good point. I mean it’s just not fair. It’s not. Guess what, ladies? What? It’s my turn today. We have procured a machine that
simulates the pain of labor contractions now. What? And I’ll finally get the
chance to live my dream and go into labor. Andy this is great! This is not happening. This is great. This is not. This is your dream! There’s one more line. Ready? Together. Let’s get ready to
do some momsplaining. No Yeah. No. Yeah. (SINGING) To all you moms out
there, you be doing it right. Hi, guys. Hi. Rya, this is Andy. Hi Rya. Hi Andy. How are you? This is Andy. Oh, you too? Have a seat. Rya was on the last
season of momsplaining. Yes, I remember. We went to a labor
class together. We met my OB/GYN, and
talked about labor together. And then she’s had a
beautiful baby boy since then. Congratulations. How old now? Thank you. He’s almost four months. And four months. Wait, I never asked– And you are? This is? Hi. Hi. I’m Martina. OK Martina. Martina’s going to just hook
some things up to your belly there, and it will
simulate labor. But don’t worry Andy. OK we’ve turned today’s
labor into a game. This is a chance you might not
feel any contractions at all if you answer the
questions right. Just for the record, I hate you. And I hate whoever was
part of this whole thing. That’s exactly how normal
labor goes isn’t it? I’m sure you guys
exchange things like that– it’s
like I hate you, why did you get me
into this, Dack! You know, it’s
just muscle memory. Of right, it’s time to play
Get This Baby Outta Me. Here are the rules. Rya and I will
read the questions. If you guys get it wrong,
Martina will give our partner a contraction. With each wrong answer,
the contractions will get more intense. Just like labor. This is insane. Let’s play. OK, honey. How long is a typical pregnancy? Nine months. Nailed it. Really, really nice. OK we’re up. Oh this is easy. At what point can
newborns cry actual tears? First week. It’s three weeks. It’s three weeks. Oh OK. OK just breathe honey. How long are we’re doing it for? Just breathe. Normal contraction. Yeah, I got it, but– OK. OK. You OK? Yeah. OK. No big deal, right? Labor’s a cinch. If you gave birth to triplets,
how many babies do you have? Three. Are you kidding me with
the question he gets? Are you a doctor? Wow. That’s impressive. OK. We can do this, Andy. Come on, you’re a great partner. How many bones does
your newborn have? 613 No, it’s is 300 bones. 300 bones. Here we go again
with the contraction. Here you go. You all right? OK. All right. That looks like it hurts. It hurts. Wow. Honey I’m seizing up
just looking at you. [BLEEP] are you kidding me? We’re not doing
really well, so I need you to step up your game. But you’ve set it up so I
fail and this one does– Am I failing, or
are you failing? Who’s failing us right now? I’m failing, Kristian. (SINGING) Push it. Push it. Oh my god. Just breathe,
honey, just breathe. Oh god. OK. You know what? I know what’s going to make
this a lot more comfortable. Have an ice chip. Ice chip is going
to fix everything. It’s still going! It’s going to fix everything. Doesn’t that feel
so much better? I feel helpless here. That’s exactly how
I felt. All right. Rya? Next question. Wait. We’re done. She’s still going. I don’t see a baby, so I
don’t think we’re done. We’ll be right back after
a word from our sponsor. Johnson’s, unlike the
endless pain of labor, the new Johnson’s baby
products are incredibly gentle. This looks like it’s
going to be a rough one. Is it supposed to hurt in
my back when they’re here? If it’s back labor, yeah. What the [BLEEP] is back labor? I really need you to get
your head in the game, OK? I don’t like losing. All right? Do you want to do
it again tomorrow? No, I don’t want to
do it again tomorrow. Me either. so let’s win today. I know, but we’re a team we
would have given people heads up that things were happening. That’s what I wanted to
tell my husband during sex, when he forgot to pull out, and
I accidentally got pregnant. Both times. How many babies are born around
the world in a single minute? A billion point seven. That doesn’t make any
mathematical sense. I know I panicked. I was panicked. The population of this
world would be infinity. Now this one you deserve. What do I do? Just breathe. Give birth. Andy, you’re crowning. You’re almost there. Breathe, breathe, breathe. Breathe, breathe, breathe. You’re doing great. [BLEEP] Just breathe. OK, OK. That’s it. How does it feel? It feels like I have a
whole new respect for women and what they go
through, and I don’t know that I had to
experience this to do that, because I feel like
I’ve always appreciated and thank you ladies. Please tell me we’re done. We are done. We are done. And just out of
curiosity Martina, how high were we on the scale? When we were at a 78. Out of? 100. Andy, you had 3/4
of a kid today. And you know what you guys get? You’re going to
get a rubber baby, and a lot of sleepless nights. There you go. Skin to skin is
really important. Thanks, Kristin. You’re very welcome. And that’s how you play
Get This Baby Outta Me. And tune in next week when
we play How The [BLEEP] Did I Get Into This Mess? All right, Kristin,
are you ready? Yeah. Good. It ramps up really slowly. Oh my god. That’s very close to what it is. It’s not this isolated. But then we go– It’s a little bit more all over. What is the number she’s at now? 84. She’s not even flinching. But can I be honest? Not as bad. Not as bad. Presented by the new Johnson’s. Improved inside and out.